Leeuwenhoek had stolen and peeped into the fantastic sub-visible world of little things, creatures that had lived, had bred, had battled, had died, completely hidden from and unknown to all men from the beginning of time. Beasts these were of a kind that ravaged and annihilated whole races of men ten million times larger than they were themselves. Beings these were, more terrible than fire-spitting dragons or hydra-headed monsters. They were silent assassins that murdered babies in warm cradles and kings in sheltered places. It was this invisible, insignificant, but implacable-and sometimes friendly- world Leeuwenhoek had looked into for the first time of all men of all countries. ~Microbe Hunters

Saturday, 24 November 2012

Cat Tattoos...

This girl I play hockey with caught something bad from the water. It was the idea to get a cat tattooed on her her body forever. I really feel bad for the girl. She is a little slut right now. It is the first year university thaang of running around like a chicken with her head cut off and legs spread apart and a blood alcohol level exceeding that of Randy Travis. That will change, fast, because she WILL become the crazy cat lady. Cats are so weird. They are the least interesting animal besides gold fish. Why in the world would you want to put one permanently on your body? It is just a calling to live alone in a dirty old house with 10 000 cats until death.

Hanging out with her sure beats having a real cat though. It pretty much does the same thing as a real cat- just stares at you until you poke it, then it retreats under some fabric. It isn't hairy, so there is no risk of allergies, and if it excretes anything on me (urine, feces, hairball, gastric juices), I would not be the only one screaming for help. Unfortunately, if she finds her way onto my property and I try and shoot the cat, I would be going to jail instead of going to get a shovel. But, even when she dies, the cat will still live on. It is permanent. When her skin starts to degrade, and the ink from the tattoo seeps out of her coffin and into the water table, someone else will drink the crazy cat water which will possess them to get a cat tattoo. And the cycle continues.

My sister and I have our next tattoo planned out. Once we travel to a very strange place together (strange is used loosely because my family doesn’t travel at all), we are going to get ‘adopted’ on our heel. It shows that we traveled somewhere cool together without the rest of our family, so our feet that carried us there must have been adopted. That one is a little far stretched, but imagine telling your grandchildren the story behind that one! Then imagine telling them ‘I like cats’. Cool.

Friday, 23 November 2012

Happy Birthday, Mommy!!

Hey Ma! There are some things that I`ve always wanted to tell you

Moma the meatloaf, I LOVE YOU
This card could have went in so many directions. I found one version saying on the inside, "But if I tell you you would probably kill me, then dad would bury me alive" and another one saying, "you're adopted". I went with the generic I LOVE YOU. Plain and simple...a little boring....

Darn good and sure of it,


Wednesday, 21 November 2012

Frats and Signs and Hitting Frats with Signs

Souvlaki is our house name that we made up when accidentally slurring words to make a combination of our names. Our motto is "Sharing is Caring" because that is the way Jillian and I lived first year, and we have adopted Nicole into this way as well.
Taylor Swift is not allowed because she is a disgrace to good ole country music and her choices in publicity and music type have won her the right to be the hero of 8 year olds, but none other.
It is also a cat free zone. You cant read the bottom here, but it says "including kittens and people who look like cats". I dont know why the bottom says what it does, but I dont like cats, so that is the rationale behind this sign.
We were watching a commercial for a movie and this came up as a cheer. We loved the cheer and made signs for behind our dining room table.
In my procrastinations one day, I found a sight that had a whole bunch of random Latin translated phrases. I liked this one that, in English, reads "Frankly my dear, I dont give a damn". This one is on my door. 

All of the above are our neighbours above us. There is an elephant, hippo, rhino, sumo wrestler, whale and buffalo. 

Our neighbours belong to some frat which I don't understand. (a.) frats in Canada are just weird, and (b.) frats having giant orgies are also weird.  I don't know what they do, but every night they play Dance Dance Revolution-Stomp Style. I haven't seen or heard any ambulances come, but pretty sure, they could have come through the floor. 

It might be because I don't understand frats, or I am a bit ignorant on the topic, but lets just call it 'biased'. I hate frats. Especially the ones that live above me in a townhouse complex. The way people explain them, it is 'paying for your friends', but if your friends are putting you in a headlock while doing a body slam on you at 3 in the morning, I wouldn't be paying them, I would be suing them.

They are nice guys, though. They have a BBQ right outside our shared doorway and we neighbourly greet them when we see them. We have been invited to one of their huge parties that starts at like 6pm and go until 11pm, then everyone is gone. Weirdest thing. It's like they kick everyone out because it is WWE practice session time. Then, at precisely 9am their music and loud chatter starts all over again.

You know what. It is American Thanksgiving, and in the spirit of "Thanks", I would like to say they are better than the neighbours last year who tried to beat down our door in the middle of the night, after trying to assault Jillian. In the spirit of Thanksgiving- Black Friday edition, though, I want to hit them with a toaster.  

Darn good and sure of it,


Tuesday, 20 November 2012

Living in Student City

I feel like I am playing hot potato with my living situation! I sign a lease, move into the place, school starts, then I have to decide where I am going to live for the next year. The time has come, again, where I have to decide what I will do with my life for another year.

In the past 3 years, I lived with 1 or more females. First year it was Bianca and Jillian in residence. Bianca was first year, first semester, but she was boring, and the opportunity arose to move rooms when Jillian, a girl I met through Krystina at the gym, was going to be roommate-less. She "drove her roommate out of the country" is what we like to say. Then I happily lived with Jillian with no problems for the remainder of the year.

Last year, there were 6 of us living in one townhouse. Always busy, always fun, almost always dramatic. I learned that I could not live with certain people from that house, so I signed a least with 2 of the girls I thought I could get along with. We signed the lease with the intentions of staying in the same place for the remainder of our time in this city.

Times have changed and Nicole can no longer live with us next year due to her placement setting, so we will have to move again. I think this is for the better because I think she is really starting to get annoyed with everything I say to her (why? I dont know, she's a girl).

Anyways, so the plan is to try and find a place for 5. Jillian and I and 3 boys- one gay- Mario, Luigi and Chow. I already know that Jillian and I can get along really well, and I am hoping that these boys will cause less drama than the previous girls I have lived with.

I am sort of excited at this chance for change.

Post on living with females vs males to follow...

Darn good and sure of it,


Monday, 19 November 2012

Happy Birthday Little Brother!!

Saturday was my brothers 18th birthday!! He is so old!! I'm so proud of yah bro :)
Happy Birthday to my baby brother Austin from the kid that mom & dad like best

Just kidding! Well, not really...Happy Birthday:)

Thursday, 15 November 2012

I'm Always Right

I'm the kind of person who always has to be right. I will get angry. It builds up inside me. If you give me one snotty remark, I will hate you and avoid you forever. If you try and prove me wrong or insult my knowledge, I will hate you and avoid you forever. If you try and piss me off by pissing me off, I will hate you and avoid you forever. If you try and pull anything over on me to make yourself feel better, I will hate you and avoid you forever.

Here's the thing. I grew up with this mindset, and I found legitimate evidence to support this mindset. In Meet the Robinsons, the bowler hat guy says, "Everyone will tell you to let it go and move on, but don't. Instead, let it fester and boil inside you". Now, see, I was right. I am always right.

Damn. I had this whole post planned out in my head but my brain went running.

Darn good and sure of it,


Tuesday, 6 November 2012

First-World Problems

You scream for a second when you poke yourself with the poppy on your jacket. That momentary relapse of forgetting all the pain and suffering and BRAVERY of those who fought for us and our country.

A few girls on my hockey team were complaining that their poppy was hurting them when it poked them. They were questioning why we even had to wear them anyways if it was just going to poke them. I came up with a really corny, but buy-able excuse for them to wear them and show respect:

Poppies are on pins so when you poke yourself, you remember the pain of those who fought for you to make that the worst pain you feel today. 

Now, are you thinking that the Obama-Romney US election is messy, look at some first-hand reporting my uncle has broadcasted over at Red Page Letters for the upcoming Sierra Leone election!

Darn good and sure of it,


Thursday, 1 November 2012

Kellie Pickler

All those people who still base their opinion of Kellie Pickler on her less-than-scholarly experience on "Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader", are horribly ignorant. I am so proud to say that Kellie Pickler is one of the greatest women in North America, and she has just become a role-model to thousands of people. Recently, Ms. Pickler gave her hair for her friend who was going through cancer treatment. No, she didn't donate her hair for a wig, she shaved her head. She is now rep-ing the new, bold, bald look to support her friend in the very emotional struggle of losing hair to cancer. It is all too easy for a person of wealth, like Ms. Pickler, to buy her friend a top-of-the-line wig. It takes someone with great courage, love, and friendship to do such a self-less act in support of someone special. For that reason, Ms. Kellie Pickler, in my opinion, you have taken a little step in helping to change the world. So, thank you! And please, continue making great music, I love you, I love your story, keep it up!

Darn good and sure of it,